K11 - Humanoid Woman

Observation: Even this early, Crow's "kitty" was an inside joke.

Movie Description: Sandy Frank presents: A bald, but still hot clone girl named Niya is found drifting in space and brought down to a scientist's family to learn how to be human. Semi-wacky things involving her telepathic powers and naivete occur and at this point I was expecting some sort of "Bicentennial Man" robot learns to live again kind of movie.

But no, it quickly, very quickly actually, goes into space where conveniently, half the cast already introduced and the girl, stowing away are on another all-too convenient trip to Niya's home planet. Once there, its not too dissimilar from the previous episode's "Space 1999" adventures as they land on a planet full of mask wearing mutants forced underground by polution. Once there, the good guys prove a little too good at cleaning up the pollution, so a midget with no real motives that I can see, uses mind control and litteral back-stabbing to try and destroy the Earthlings.

Movie Review: I can see why, when coming back to the Sandy Frank library in season three that the Best Brains skipped over this one: Its far too good. Really, even the dubbing is pretty adequate, not a single terrible screeching voice to be heard. All that being said, there were still some particularly goofy elements to this movie, the dumb robots, cheesy telekensis effects and the odd soap bubble monster at the end. But still, pretty good sci-fi.
6/10

Riffing: For the second episode in a row it's Crow, Crow, Crow as far as hit to miss ratio goes. Although to be fair, Joel had some decent barbs as well, mostly targeting the movies Kraftwerk like sound track. Its also funny to note when both Servo and Joel go for a joke at the same time, at least thus far, Servo usually bullies his way into saying it first, so Joel's jokes are a few seconds late by the time he gets them out. As much praise as I might pile on this, its still not up to the later standards of the show, if just for volume alone, thus the reluctant low rating.
Best riff: Was that Superman's dad?
5/10

Sketches: Very short for the most part, although pretty good. Good enough that the middle sketch, where Servo romances a blender, is later re-used almost verbatim and I swear the third sketch about surrealism is later salvaged as well. Not a lot to say really about the rest, the movie must have been long.
4/10

Overall: Watchable movie, enjoyable theater segements = good. Short sketches = Meh. Good, but not outstanding, even graded on a curve like I seem to be grading these early episodes. They do seem to be hitting their rhythem, at least in the theater.
5/10

What I learned: Go to the Astra. Go to the Astra. Go to the Astra.

Sh(C)ould Be MSTied: "Invasion From Inner Earth"

1974, Color, USA

Movie Description: Two words: Bill Rebane.

As in "Giant Spider Invasion" Bill Rebane. As in "Monster A-Go-Go" Bill Rebane.

Bill Rebane = Wisconsin's Ed Wood.

Anywho, as for the actual movie itself, it revolves around three scientists who are doing scientist like things in some remote cabin in the Canadian woods, and their hosts, a brother and sister who run an airline or hunting lodge or some such thing.

Meanwhile, in the outside world, all hell is breaking loose (exemplified by shots of people running around streets with lots of red smoke) as a plague is killing everybody and aliens are showing up an abducting people and communications are breaking down. Or not. Its really hard to tell because nothing makes a lick of sense when the leaves the main characters in the cabin, as the scenes remind me of one of those mid-seventies sketch movies only not funny.



Back at the cabin, they loose all communications, try to fly home but can't land at one airport because everybody is sick, land at another where everybody's dead (?) see a red light, a plane crash, find a snow mobile, talk to a guy who sounds like a kid doing a 'robot' voice, and several other unexplained things. The only explanations come from shaggy bearded Max (Paul Bentzen, the creepy cousin in "Giant Spider Invasion") who rambles on about giant roses, and martians from inside the earth.

This makes the movie sound far, far too exciting. It's mostly shots of people wandering through the snowy woods while 30 second music samples play at random, and people then talking, talking, and more talking inside various cabins. It's all quite dull. In the end, out of food, our heroes that are left stumble around in the frozen woods for ten minutes until the last two of them (bearded Stan and the token girl) meet in an empty town, hold hands, and turn into naked children in an Adam and Eve lite deal. The end.

3/10



Is it MST3K Materiel? Yes.
More of a Mike or more of a Joel? Mike.

Why?: Although most of the movie is rather, tepid, and just features long scenes of people walking, the weird interludes of fake radio and TV shows break up the monotany just enough. Add to that the ever shifting music during the long walking scenes and I think this could of made an adequate, if not great, movie for the Mike and the bots.